“This is a hard thing to do. We can do hard things.”
_{Glennon Doyle}

I wish that you will feel less alone when hearing this song. Listen to my voice reminding you to breathe. I can’t be there in person, but I’m with you in spirit. 

Grief, loss and trauma have a sliding scale. There is no need to measure, defend, prove, deny or compare anything. If you’re feeling it, it’s real. There is no place for judgment. 

Somethings feel too hard to endure. In this song, it’s cathartic to hear the lyrics name and validate the experience of being overwhelmed with unmanageable feelings or symptoms. The video shows glacial-fed rushing water that is too hard to cross and we don’t know what’s below the surface. Even though good things exist in the world, we can’t see or feel them when we’re locked in a panic-loop of intrusive thoughts. 

My wish is that when it feels TOO HARD, you can listen to this song to help the grief move through you… and to breathe… so you can find a place of calm. Intentional breathing is a way to help us regulate and slow-down the chaos within. 

Try out your options and see what works best for you. 

So Hard (a song for grieving)

You can stream or download the audio by clicking below.

OR, you may listen while watching a video with Yukon nature images by clicking below.

Sometimes in life we experience loss, grief and trauma so acutely that our ability for reasoning and decision-making shuts down. Our nervous system is wired to react to a threat to alert us of danger. We feel this physically in our body. This state of ‘fight, flight or freeze’ is an exhausting psycho-physiological event! So, how to get our brain back on-line during crushing anxiety or grief?

First step: BREATHE. 

I offer this song to bring comfort during overwhelming grief or anxiety.
May it be a tool to support the process of de-escalation.

“Breathe In Peace” and “So Hard” can be companion songs.

Exercise:

💜 Start with “So Hard” and follow with “Breathe in Peace”. 
Keep taking full comfortable breaths throughout. Sing along with the recording if it feels good. When you’ve learned the songs, you can sing them on your own, out-loud or in your head. You can tweak the lyrics to make it feel true for you. When you sing, you can repeat it for as long as it feels right. Or, repeat the recording for a longer “time-out”.
💜 See if you prefer to watch the nature images while listening to the video; OR if you prefer to listen to the audio while taking a peaceful pause, or during mild exercise, for example.
💜 You choose in the moment if only one or both of the songs resonate with you. Notice. Practice breathing through whatever comes up.
💜 There is no right or wrong way. The goal is to find the tool that is effective for you in this moment. Keep breathing deeply and intentionally throughout. Keep in mind that it takes TIME to calm down a racing brain and nervous system. Keep going. Our brains get good at what we practice. It takes repetition and patience. It’s worth it.
💜 Releasing is GOOD. Try to accept it. Get curious. No judgement.
💜 If you’re still feeling stuck, another technique to get the brain out of a deep rut, is to get your right and left sides moving. Try dancing, or tapping toes/hands alternating left and right. Sometimes I place my right hand on my left shoulder and my left hand on my right shoulder, like I’m giving myself a hug. And from that position, I tap my hands on my shoulders back and forth keeping rhythm to the song I’m singing to soothe myself. It can help bring me back to the present. I can do this while lying comfortably. But if you’re able to get moving, try that to stimulate a change in the brain pattern. Remember: Breathe deeply and alternate right-left movement. Fall into the comfort of music as best as you can.
💜 When you’re ready, finish by naming three (or more) things you are grateful for. 
💜 This double-song exercise takes 7-10 minutes. A song break is do-able. :)
💜 PEACE